So today has been an educational day for me.

First I realized that the only person who needs to cheer for me is me!  What do I mean you might ask??

Well, today I was driving back to the office after working in Richmond, and had to move across three lanes of traffic.  If any of you know me this is quite the feat for me.  Not because I cannot do it, but because I am an insanely nervous driver.  Well, today I did it.  With a maximum of 2 car lengths between cars, I moved across 3 lanes of busy traffic!  I was so proud, as I was driving I was thinking who should I call to tell them about it.. Walking through the conversation in my head “You would be so proud of me…. ”  But when I took the time to slow down the thoughts in my head and consider those simple words, I realized that I probably don’t know anyone who would be “proud” of me, but ME.  Yes they would politely comment that I did a wonderful job, and probably say something like “I knew you could do it”, but would they truly feel proud of me?  DOUBTFUL.  Unless you are a person who has lived with extensive anxieties, or understand how crippling they can be, would you truly and honestly be able to say you were proud?  It was then that I realized, it didn’t matter to me if they were proud… I was proud of myself and that is truly all that matters.

The second lesson I learned is that even when you are angry, unless someone else is angry about the same item, there is no point in venting because you just get more frustrated in the end.  I am not going to expand on this one, as it was because of a misunderstood situation at work, that I since learned was not what I thought at all.  But it was an important lesson for me to learn.  What I have discovered is that only I interpret items the same way. And it takes a lot of effort and frustration to convince someone of my position when I am frustrated.   I think it is time for me to find a new method to “vent” my concerns.  Now the problem is where and what to do.